August Flew By

I started working again and the month of August flew by. It was not physically hard to go back to work but it was emotionally and mentally tough. I was sad that I could no longer have long daily phone chats with April or see the grandkids anytime I wanted. It was also difficult to once again have my mornings start with an alarm clock.

I am very happy that I found a great job with the County as a retirement specialist. The work is interesting and it is strictly an 8 to 5 job. I spent so many years working more than forty hours a week that this job seems cushy. Most importantly, I have very good health and retirement plans.

Speaking of health, last week I had a check up and the test results were good - no sign of cancer. I am officially 18 months cancer free! Unfortunately the County does not contract with Kaiser and I now must locate a new oncologist. It was very, very sad to say good-bye to Dr. Risbud and the oncology nurses. I hate good-byes anyway and these were particularily difficult.

Perhaps you have heard that after chemo hair may grow in differently. I have written about the change of color - I have less auburn hair, more brown hair, and a lot more gray hair. At first it was difficult to see so much gray but it became easier as it filled in with brown and auburn hair; my husband thinks it looks like I have had it streaked. Of course I am one of those lucky women - my husband thinks I look great no matter what. Most of the time I am ok with the color but what I am not comfortable with is how wavy and thick it now is. Even with gel, paste, and hairspray my hair is so wavy and uncontrollable that I feel shaggy. It was so bad in the mornings that I felt like a rooster - this uncontrollable wavy mass sticking out all over my head! So, I have had it cut twice and the second time I had it cut much shorter and thinned. It is easier to manage now. I remember when Donna told me that being bald was easier than having bad hair days - oh how right she was!

I am learning to live life "after cancer". I have the physical reminders - the changes of my body, some slight problems with lymphodemia, and of course the changes with my hair. Everyday I have the reminder of what I have survived - everyday I have the reminder of how blessed I am.